25 February 2022

The Naked Truth and Bare Facts About Nudity


Naked. Nude. Bare. Unclothed. In the raw. In the altogether. Au naturel. Disrobed. In one’s birthday suit. In the buff. Starkers. Undressed. Stripped. Baring all. Nothing left to the imagination.

Titillating? Obscene? Erotic? Inappropriate? Natural? Beautiful? Ugly? Functional? Freeing?

It all depends on the context and the eyes of the beholder.

Society has long had a fascination with nudity.  

Would going to a nudist colony be fun, or would it be too much? After all, from a man’s perspective, it’s not as if there would be nothing but beautiful young women there.

Nude beaches are the same. A great idea but in reality not a place to pick someone up or to stare. Both the colony and the beach are places for people who genuinely enjoy freedom from clothing.

There was a news story yesterday about a woman in Florida (where else?) who went into a bar where she was refused service owing to her advanced state of intoxication. In response, she removed her clothing, every stitch. The police had to be called. The kicker was that the woman is a lawyer. 

Public nudity in most places at most times in most countries is a crime. 

I guarantee that a lot of men saw that story and immediately wondered how old the woman was and whether she was fetching. (Men are like that.) She was forty-nine and you’ll have to see for yourself if you’re interested in her appearance.

I grew up in a Finnish family that regularly took saunas together. When I got older it became segregated by gender. So I am not prudish about nudity. A lot of people are and don’t like to strip or shower in gyms. I never give it a thought.

I’m a great admirer of the feminine form. As a young teen I would sometimes get ahold of a Playboy magazine. The women in them seemed impossibly beautiful, like nothing one saw in real life. Twas the nudity (okay, and the air-brushing).

As an older teen I finally went on dates, kissed girls and indulged in sexual fantasies. Second to contemplating sex was contemplating seeing an object of desire naked. It seemed the ultimate experience. When I finally saw a naked girl it lived up to my expectations, particularly since the experience included actual real life sexual congress. 

Subsequently I saw nude women in a strip club. It was something I initially enjoyed but soon found depressing. After all, it was an act of commerce. This was not a young woman who I was alone in a bedroom with, but someone others were staring at the same time. That realization killed the thrill.

Even after having seen a nude female and losing one’s virginity, I continued to spend hours imagining other girls naked — not to mention what bedding them would be like. This is a practice common among most heterosexual men I know, whether they admit it or not.

My understanding is that women do not similarly obsess about naked men. As Elaine told Jerry in an episode of Seinfeld, men’s bodies are important for their functionality. I believe that was the same episode in which Jerry had a girlfriend who liked to be naked as often as possible. Jerry found this a bit much, recognizing as he did that there was both “good naked” and “bad naked.” 

Today photos and videos of naked people proliferate on the internet. In all shapes and sizes. Some are engaging in pornographic acts, while others are artfully posing. Imagine that, all the nudity you could want. My younger self would have salivated at the idea. But there’s something off-putting about the availability. It’s not enticing.

Better is nudity in films and TV shows. Even if you’re absorbed in the story one can’t help but notice that someone on the screen is exposing, breasts, buttocks or genitalia. It can be distracting. It can enhance the story. It can be erotic. When it’s a well-known star there’s that moment when you think: wow, I’m seeing Jane Superstar naked. But if the story is good you quickly re-focus. If you're enjoying the nudity too much it mustn't be a very good film.

There is also nudity in art, which is a good place for it when done tastefully. It’s hard to imagine Michelangelo’s David wearing a sweater vest. People who object to nude figures in art are beyond help.

There is also very bad nudity as when a person is being seen or photographed against their will. Slaves were usually stripped naked when sold. An unimaginable act of cruelty. Non-consensual nudity is just this side of rape.

Some of those naked pictures on the internet are of people who never intended for the photos to be seen. A lot of that is in what’s called revenge porn. Horrible people do that.

Then there’s skinny dipping, a practice I’ve indulged in. We used to go up to my in-laws place in rural Oregon every summer. They lived near a river where I would swim most every day. Occasionally I felt like doing so sans swimming trucks. I preferred it but was reticent because, though isolated, there was still the chance of a fisherman or hiker happening by. Once while naked I swam a ways down river towards a rock I liked to rest on. I was about to get on the rock when I noticed a young woman by the side of the river wearing a bikini laying on a towel. She was pretty. I was (and still am) a happily married man with two children but couldn’t deny feeling, if not exactly arousal, a tingling about the situation. Of course there was nothing for me to do but swim back upstream, battling the currents along the way. I was thereafter more circumspect about swimming nude.

It’s interesting and sometimes depressing to note how certain cultures (often as a consequence of the its dominant religion) have, throughout history, treated nudity as sinful and considered indigenous people, as savages if they are in the habit of walking around naked. As if the human body was something to be ashamed of! That is a far sicker attitude than enjoying seeing someone naked. 

Many European cultures are much less inhibited about nudity than the U.S. Nude beaches are more prevalent, nudity on regular TV channels is permitted and communal saunas and steam baths are not uncommon. American is far more puritanical -- to it's own detriment.

One of the great attractions of nudity is that the human body can be a joy to behold. Obviously this is particularly true as a prelude to intercourse. 

Feasting ones eyes on a naked body can be enjoyed for artistic purposes or as part of the sex act. I’m for both.

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