A Free Day is Not to be Wasted Not Watching a Movie

It was a hard, mean dream that woke me up confused. Gas masks and riot police and darkness too early. Quarrels with friends over silly things. So I sat up sluggishly and rubbed the ache in my shoulder.

No work today. Less money in the bank. Another worry. A long hot shower would help some. And did.

Cold cereal and hot tea to get started. As usual the news was almost all bad. More young people shot dead. More bombs being dropped in faraway places. More people suffering publicly and unashamedly. To dwell on it all would be a quick route to the blues. Didn't need that. Running errands would make more sense. Feeling productive is a salve to the psyche.

Visited big brother in the hospital. Day after his knee replacement surgery. His spirits were clear and steady. Purposeful about the pain and rehabilitation ahead. Twice the man I am. Hell if I'm half that I've got something to brag on.

Long idle phone chat with the missus. She's at work and busy but takes the time hear me bitch about little things. Am I the unwisest person I know or is it just that I'm wise enough to surround myself with the sagacious? Another fucking question that I can't answer. So many.

Problems with the cable box. Exchange it for one that doesn't work at all and there you have it, another dollop of aggravation. Didn't need to watch any TV anyway. What a vast sad wasteland it is. Clutters my brain with nonsense.

So here I am at early afternoon. Searching. Where's that movie I want to watch? There's got to be one. Always is. I've got near 200 so there's always one that needs watching. Plus Netflix instant has a couple of dozen beckoning me.

I wish I had something productive to do right now. Writing can sure feel good but is so isolating. You do it all alone (insert joke about adolescence here) and often don't get any feedback. You've got just yourself usually to tell yourself: that was okay. Hmm, that's all ego, what your soul feels is important and mine tells me good things after I write.

But I still don't know what movie to watch and my soul doesn't seem to have an opinion on the matter. Could it be I'm not meant to watch a movie right now? That's crazy talk. I'll sort this out. A free day is not to be wasted not watching a movie. Outta be a law.

I'll sit in the back and read for awhile. The birds will inspire me to make the right choice. Chirp.