21 March 2011

Do Moose Ever Suffer Constipation? My Poetic Response to Harsh Comments

This morning I awoke to find that IMDb had linked one of my post's from last week on their daily hit list. (Thanks guys.) As usual this resulted in some really nice people posting really nice comments. (Awww.) But as often happens, there were some people, all of whom called themselves anonymous (ain't that always the case) who posted some not nice comments. In this instance they all related to the fact that in naming movie characters I'd like to hire as professionals, if such a magical power were truly possible, I'd not mentioned a single one who appeared in film made these past 34 years. We are all by now familiar with how many young movie goers consider anything from the 1990's ancient history and don't know Mae Clark from Clark Gable. Their loss.

I was not the offended in the slightest by their comments, nor even, at this advanced stage of film loving, even saddened. To the contrary I was inspired to wax poetic. I responded to each comment in verse. Not on the original post but right here. In all three cases I present the comment followed by a short response in rhyme. Please enjoy.

Have you seen a movie in the last 50 years?

No I stopped going in 1961
I liked it for awhile but then it was no fun
I've lied about those I've said I've seen
I know, right, I'm really mean

It's too bad they haven't made movies in the past 40 years, then maybe some people could understand this stupid article.

Yes, it's a shame they stopped in 1971
Look how many more films could have been done
The article is stupid this is true
That realization has left me feeling blue
And you?
Are you twelve years old, sent home from school?
Do you slobber do you drool?

How about someone on this list who is either a) still alive, or b) still in possession of a driver's license?

How about a life better lived?
How about the joys we could have gived?
How about someone still alive
Seriously, I mean it, no jive
Maybe someone young, hip and cool
Like Charlie Sheen, that wacky ghoul
Spring is coming and baseball too
Lots of outdoor things we can do
Living a life filled with rhyme
And watching great films from another time


KC said...

It's funny how seriously people take entertainment. It makes you wonder how anyone could think that funding for the arts is frivolous. I watch a lot of old and new movies and I can't think of anyone I would change on your list. I guess I'm just part of the problem!
(I loved that post. I put it in my Classic Links post for the day.)

Tudor Queen said...

Love your film criticism, your poetry, your overall sensibility, and your moose.

Meredith said...

insert orson welles as charles foster kane energetic clapping. this is great.