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| Ana de Armas has a new film coming to Hulu |
In the summer of 2020 I started printing headlines from various news sources and writing comments about them that were either pithy, snarky, wise or brilliantly on point (or a combination thereof). The response was so overwhelming (thank you, Humphrey Puddleduck of Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin) that I made this is a monthly feature -- to enthusiastic acclaim. However I didn't get around to either December or January editions of this critically-acclaimed feature. The letters, texts, emails, telegrams and smoke signals came pouring in as a result. But heedless of your requests, we are resuming this beloved (reviled?) feature. Enjoy the February 2022 edition -- like it or not.
From CNN:
Americans less likely to have sex, partner up and get married than ever
Partner Up? Really, CNN? This is NOT acceptable. Another abuse of the word "up" in a phrasal verb. It joins "coach up" "link up" and "meet up" as linguistically blasphemous. I've railed about "partner up" before, indeed, quite recently, but to see it in the title to a story on a "respected" news source's website is too much. Enough with the "up." It makes me want to "throw up."
A billionaire CEO is on track to go further into space than any human in 50 years
If billionaires have enough money to joy ride into space than they have too much money and we need to start taxing these motherfuckers at a much higher rate. And for the love of god, let's start eliminating the jillions of loopholes in the tax code that these greedy bastards benefit from.
Florida's 'don't say gay' bill is cruel and dangerous
That's for sure. Ya know you get used to the idea of forward progress, situations that have started to improve continuing to improve, then some bullshit like this comes along. From the article I give you this quote: "As leaders in two LGBTQ organizations, we've been astonished to witness the progress we have made over the last decade. But it's also clear that our community's increased visibility has led to a backlash. There are currently more than 100 anti-LGBTQ bills -- the majority of which target transgender and nonbinary youth -- moving through state legislatures across the country." Fucking Florida.
'We're not asking for magical things': Anti-gun violence groups launch campaign to pressure Biden four years after Parkland
Sad to say that if we couldn't get any gun control legislation passed in the wake of Sandy Hook in which two dozen small children were murdered then it ain't happening. I hope I'm proved wrong some day.
From the New York Times:
Pedestrian Deaths Spike in U.S. as Reckless Driving Surges
Oh look everyone! More bad news. A pandemic, possible war in Ukraine, anti-voting legislation not enough for you? Not enough of a resurgence of book banning, racism and homophobia? Fine then, we'll throw in an increase in reckless drivers killing pedestrians. When it rains....
How Bad Is the Western Drought? Worst in 12 Centuries, Study Finds
Still not enough bad news for you? For those of us in the western United States we've got a drought of biblical proportions. We've had less than a half an inch of rain in the past six weeks and a quick check of the calendar indicates that this is Winter. When it doesn't rain it doesn't pour....
Wanda Sykes, Amy Schumer and Regina Hall to Host the Oscars
I'm sure there'll be fine but why they haven't asked Steve Martin to do it every year is a mystery to me. Given that I no longer watch the Oscars I don't really understand why I care.
Pastor Resigns After Incorrectly Performing Thousands of Baptisms
Excuse me, but it's a meaningless ceremony so being one word off doesn't mean diddly shit. But you do you, Catholics.
From the BBC:
Mexico violence: Gunmen attack wake, then target funeral
Monsters. They killed nine people who were mourning. The depths society has reached is immeasurable.
Bionic eye tech aims to help blind people see
It's still in early stages but early results are promising. In other words what we have here is that great rarity: good news.
Why people still believe in the 'soulmate myth'
Ahem. I'm enjoying Valentine's Day with a woman who is my wife, soulmate and love of my life. Over forty-three years since we met and I knew within a week that she was "the one." It's no myth, you lousy cynics.
From the Washington Post:
Judge to dismiss Sarah Palin’s libel case against New York Times
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Go back to being irrelevant, Sarah.
The 5 best Super Bowl commercials
They're fucking commercials. Why the hell do we celebrate them? Talk about skewed priorities. You'll have to excuse my hatred of commercials but it's real and deep. I'm ever so thankful for the DVR function that allows one to record and fast forward through commercials. I got around the commercials during the Super Bowl as I always do, by not watching the game. Works every time.
Cook Islands confirms first coronavirus case — two years into pandemic
Geez Cook Islands, try keeping up, willya?
From Vanity Fair:
‘Deep Water’ Teaser Trailer: Ben Affleck, Ana de Armas’ Erotic Thriller Debuts on Hulu in March
I hope it's good. At least it gave me an excuse to use a photo of Miss de Armas in this post.
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