What exactly am I celebrating? It has been well-documented on this blog that I have always loved Christmas and that I’m most emphatically NOT a Christian.
I’m not celebrating the Winter Solstice because why would I? Yet every year we buy and trim a Christmas tree. We festoon the house with Christmas decor and from early December through the 25th the only music I listen to is Christmas carols. Even my laptop features Christmas themed wallpaper for most of the month. In the fortnight leading to the 25th we watch Christmas movies and episodes of our favorite TV shows set at Christmas. So what gives? What exactly am I celebrating? What am I so giddy about?
Gifts for one thing. That was a real attraction for me as kid. New toys. The thing is, it never stopped being really appealing to me. People giving you things, for free. No strings attached. And I’m easy to buy for. I gave hints. I no longer shop at Amazon but I do maintain a wish list there. You’re welcome. But I also like giving them. I put thought into gift-buying and usually people either like the gifts I gave them or do a bang up job of pretending they do. Giving someone a much-appreciated present is a hard feeling to top.
Then there’s the time with family. Complete with good food and tasty desserts. You can go ahead and over indulge because it’s but once a year. Some family you’ve seen plenty of during the year, other’s you’ve hardly seen at all. I realize that there are a lot of people who don’t like spending time with family. They’ve got a MAGA grandmother, an overly judgmental mother-in-law, a drunken Uncle, a cousin who’s a jerk. Not so with our brood. I was the designated drunk for a while but have been sober for decades. I like my family both immediate and extended. Like doesn’t do it, I love them.
Another thing about the holiday season is that it’s a break from the routine. That’s something that drew me in as a child and still does today. The trees, decorations, music are all different. We need that. I believe we especially need it now given the state of the country.
I know the holidays can be depressing for a lot of people. It’s a difficult time for people in recovery too. Being a 12 stepper and a sufferer of depression I understand. Further proof of the lack of perfection we experience in this life.
Christmas has gotten wrapped up (pun not intended) in politics in recent years. It started when people who don’t celebrate the holiday objected to constantly being wished a merry one. As a society we started trying to be more inclusive in the late Sixties. In that spirit, Merry Christmas was replaced by many with Happy Holidays. Eventually there was a backlash from the neanderthals on the right who started to imagine that there was a “war on Christmas” an utterly ridiculous notion given the importance of Christmas in our culture and to our economy. This has led to overreaches from both sides. I present three examples from my own experience.
When I was a middle school teacher we had a yearly Secret Santa tradition. One year at an early December faculty meeting as we reviewed the rules surrounding Secret Santa, a new member of our faculty stated that she objected to the term Secret Santa because — and this is true — she hated the whole notion of Santa Claus. It was thus decided that — based on the feelings of one person out of thirty — Secret Santa would henceforth be known as Secret Pal. I immediately withdrew my participation.
When my daughters were in day care the center would acknowledge, with decor and activities, various celebrations from different cultures. This included Cinco De Mayo, Diwali, Yom Kippur and the like. That was fine by me. But when it came to putting up a Christmas tree they asked families if there was any objection. One family of the twenty-five did indeed object and as a consequence there was no tree. Mind you, they never asked about any of the other celebrations. Again the tyranny of the minority.
About ten years ago I was teaching at an English language school in San Francisco. At the festive time of year I would wear a different Christmas tie everyday. One of my co-workers loved the ties and would always ask to get a closer look. One day she referred to them as “holiday” ties. I pointed out that as they only represented one particular holiday I thought it more accurate to call them Christmas ties. She didn’t speak to me for the rest of that holiday season. Seriously.
Despite these incidences I have generally found this to be a perfectly delightful time of year — my favorite — with most people in fine spirits. Even though many of us are unclear why we’re celebrating. I think it only appropriate to close by wishing everyone who celebrates a Merry Christmas and the rest of you Happy Holidays!
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